Updated: Jun 7, 2018
by Jenna Henderson
Thursday, December 3, 2009
i have been a blog failure lately. i apologize. i figured i should start with that.
So i laid down about an hour ago to go to bed and tonight is one of those nights that i can't shut my mind off, even after i journaled some of these thoughts. Usually i hate when i can't sleep when i want, but tonight i don't mind.
I have this feeling that the Lord means to make something tremendous of this life i am living. I know he wants to mold me and form me into something that looks more like Him. I think that this past year has been really cool in that i have learned, well, i guess i have come to realize the depth of my need for Him. There was a long stretch of my walk with Christ where i really thought i had it all together for the most part. I was fairly self-sufficient.
I feel like i am seeing my need daily. I feel like He is showing me the parts of my life that do not glorify him. This isn't in a self-depreciating way-more like it is in a life-giving way. There is so much freedom in need. His grace and love is pushing me into growth and dependency.
I want to be refined, pruned, sharpened...molded into who he has in mind for me to be. I don't care about the process, just that it happens. I want life to the full. I don't want to miss out.
I like the jars of clay song "something beautiful". I just feel thankful that 8-somewhat years into this thing with God, i am still learning that there is so much area for growth and so much adventure still ahead.
i maybe should have learned by now that blogging at night when i am thinking too much might be a bad idea. maybe more than people care to read. anyway... its a tool to help me process i guess. :)